Have you ever wanted to find a quiet, secluded place to hide - somewhere no one would ever find you? A place where you can be alone with your thoughts? Oh, how I desire that hidden place right now. Part of me was fearful this weekend that I was sinking into some sort of funk - an all too familiar place over the last several years. But this time seems different. I'm not sad, upset, angry, fearful or any other emotion. I am just in a place where I want to be Brandi, all by herself. Thankfully, this next weekend is the annual Garner Family Camping Trip. We escape to Cherokee, N.C. every October to spend a few days playing cards, taking walks, cooking over an open fire and just relaxing. Throughout the last several years, we have all developed very fast paced lifestyles inclusive of careers, grad school and numerous other responsibilities we all find. This year's trip could not have come at a better time.
I love my friends, more than I can express in words, but I have gotten so caught up in the lives of others that I have lost sight of what my future is suppose to look like. I don't want to talk to anyone, go anywhere, plan anything - I just want to sit and mindlessly read a book. Guess its a good thing that Dad lets me hide by the fire for the majority of our camping trip. He's 100% content sitting in complete silence for hours at a time.
You may be thinking how odd this all sounds - since I am a relationally driven social butterfly. I can't explain it and none of it has to do with anyone. I am just ready for some down time. A good friend reminded me this afternoon that I have lived my life in the acceleration lane for many, many years. I have never given myself the opportunity to settle into a healthy balance. I guess now is as good a time as any other.
I bet if you had known this was a rambling post with no real purpose, you would have skipped it. :) Sometimes I'm just not 100% put together and I'm finding -That is ok. :)
