Have you ever had that moment where the thought crosses your
mind that life is nothing like you thought it would be? I’m not complaining,
for I am TRULY BLESSED, but I’d be lying if I told you that my life is exactly
what I pictured it to be when I was younger. To be completely honest, my life
is nothing like what I thought it would be. Throughout the last 4 years, a
paradigm shift has taken place with my hopes, dreams and priorities. The girl
who once wanted to be a prosecuting attorney and put criminals behind bars is
now an adult who wishes she could walk away from all responsibilities and sing
for a living… (seems kind of backwards doesn’t it!) All of those “goals” I had
as a graduating senior are just slight memories. So what happened?
Well, I turned my life over to Jesus
completely – 100% holding nothing back – in February of 2007. I was saved as a
young teenager, but never really lived the life of a follower of Christ until
after college. At some point, every “Christian” makes the decision to be bought
in or sold out. The difference is the same as a fan and a follower. I was “bought
in” when I earnestly prayed the prayer to ask Jesus into my heart, making me a
fan. I “sold out” when I made the conscious decision to live my life in total
abandon for what God called me to in this one life, making me a follower of the
teachings written in the Word. Am I perfect? Um-No! Do I still sin and make
mistakes? Most definitely! I just attempt everyday to get out of bed and do
what I can to positively impact the Kingdom. There are days when I feel like
thee world is attacking me from all angles and I just want to surrender to the
pressure. Then I remember John 16:33, “I have told you all this
so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and
sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.” As believers,
we were never promised an easy road; never promised all joy and no pain; never
promised every prayer would have a “yes” answer. To think this is to have
uninformed expectations.
At age 28, I have no clue what my future
looks like – BUT I do know that I trust the One who has complete control of it.
He has allowed old friends to resurface, a change in professional direction,
and so much revelation that I cannot quite wrap my mind around what the next 6
months will look like, much less the next 6 years. There are still many things
I seek from this life (marriage, children, no debt, and others) but I have
chosen to lay it all at the foot of the cross in anticipation of what God has
in store for me. If I’ve learned anything, it’s that I cannot force my ideal
life to happen. I continue to work hard and push forward, all the while begging
God to use me in some significant way – significant to the kingdom, not the
world. After all – the one scripture that continues to echo in my mind is Philippians
1:6, “And I am certain that God, who began the good
work within you (me), will continue his work until it is finally finished on
the day when Christ Jesus returns.”
As I’ve rambled here, I hope you’ve been
encouraged in some small way. Surely I’m not the only person in the world who
feels that I am “in waiting” for what God has planned for this one life He has
blessed me with.
Be blessed today!
